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I should Start Therapy, But...

8/31/2018

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It can be tough to make the decision to get help. There are many factors which can hold people back from beginning (or returning to) therapy. Some common hesitations I have heard clients struggle with prior to making that call include:
  1. Are my problems really that bad?
  2. There are plenty of people worse off than I am...so why should I go to therapy?
  3. I really don't feel like spilling my life story to a stranger.
  4. I've felt worse than this before - I'll be fine. 
  5. How on earth can I fit therapy sessions into my already hectic week?
Why the hesitation? Well, it certainly can relate to the ongoing stigma regarding mental health and psychotherapy. There are deeply set stereotypes about therapy from well over a century ago that still persist today, including therapy being for "crazy people," viewing help seeking as a sign of emotional weakness, or that receiving therapy is something to be ashamed of. In addition to stigma, others may have a hard time recognizing their pain AND seeing it as valid, often undermining the importance of their own self-care and well-being. Still other sources of hesitation may reflect a lack of prioritizing individual needs, tendencies toward being more of a private person, or skepticism about psychotherapy. Let's unpack some of those hesitations. 
  1. Are my problems really that bad? Psychotherapy is effective for all sorts of struggles regardless of type or severity. It is flexible, client-directed, and can be customized to fit your needs. It has utility for everything from time management skills, to understanding yourself better, to managing mood, anxiety, substance use, or schizophrenia. There is no required level of severity to warrant therapy; rather, if you are even asking that question, it's a good sign that you could benefit from it. Some of the many signs that it is a good idea to go include: your normal sources of joy and stress relief are no longer doing the trick; you're in a major life transition that is causing you discomfort; you're noticing symptoms of lasting sadness, anxiety, or lack of energy that are impairing your normal routines; you're falling into destructive habits; you're having problems in your relationships; or, you experienced a trauma or loss and are struggling to bounce back. Your pain is valid, and you are deserving of help. 
  2. There are plenty of people worse off than I am...so why should I go to therapy? Similar to the first point, there is no required level of severity for therapy to be indicated. To be human is to struggle, and emotional distress is universal regardless of its cause. Depression, anxiety, and distress do not discriminate. 
  3. I really don't feel like spilling my life story to a stranger. Yup, I get that. It can feel overwhelming and intimidating to be vulnerable with someone you've never met before. You may come from a family or cultural background in which privacy is a major value, or you may just be a more shy or private person. It can help to be informed about what to expect at your first session to dispel some anxiety about starting therapy. Also, know that your therapist is aware of how hard it can be to get started and can help you ease in at a pace that feels comfortable for you. 
  4. I've felt worse than this before - I'll be fine. It is common for those who have experienced emotional struggles once to experience them again. Depression and anxiety often ebbs and flows with our environmental stressors, time of year, etc., and some may be biologically predisposed to experience mood symptoms. Many find it beneficial to revisit therapy for a short-term "booster" course of treatment if they have already done counseling before. Additionally, just because you have felt worse doesn't mean you need to keep suffering. Notice the patterns of your distress and seek help to find ways to intervene.
  5. How on earth can I fit therapy sessions into my already hectic week? Yup, I get that, too. It can be hard to make space for therapy, whether from a financial perspective or carving out time in your schedule. We typically don't hesitate too much to get to the doctor's office for a physical complaint - why don't we value attending to our mental health to the same degree? Your emotional pain is just as important as physical discomfort, and seeking help can improve your well-being drastically. Many therapists may offer evening or weekend availability to meet the needs of busy schedules. There are also options for making therapy more affordable, so don't foreclose on seeking help too soon. Here are some strategies for finding a therapist. 

What other hesitations might you have before seeking help? Other stigmas you want to debunk? Share them below!
1 Comment
Kayla Sullivan link
9/25/2021 01:26:38 pm

Thankks for this

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    Author

    Dr. Bethany Detwiler is a psychologist practicing in Allentown, PA. She specializes in mood and relationship struggles. She also is an adjunct professor of counseling at Lehigh University.

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